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School choice disputes: where will your child go to school?

February 9, 2020 · by Pittsburgh Family Law Services, P.C.

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“Children learn more from what you are than what you teach.” – W.E.B. Dubois

Back to School… but which one?

Deciding where your child will go to school can be a very personal and oftentimes emotional decision, even for two-parent households. You might have a personal history with a specific school, and might even want your children to learn from some of your own former teachers. Perhaps you chose your current neighborhood for the sake of its school system. No matter the reason, many parents have very strong and specific educational preferences for their children. In custody disputes between parents of school-age children, issues of school choice often need to be addressed. If you face a dispute over who gets to pick your children’s school, here are a few points to keep in mind.

If you can, discuss the subject with your co-parent. Describe the outcome you would prefer and why you think it is the right decision, and ask what your co-parent thinks. Listen to the answer, and consider it seriously. Consider whether there is an alternative way to address each parent’s concerns outside of a court battle, and also whether one possible outcome might put an unsustainable burden on the other parent or the children, when compared to the other outcome.

You should also discuss this issue with your local child custody attorney, just as soon as you have reason to know that you and your co-parent might disagree about it. Courts seldom move quickly, and too many parents wait to raise the issue until the summertime, joining the crowd of other last-minute parents who need quick decisions from hard-pressed judges over where their children will go to school in the fall. When that happens, it is more likely that your family court judge will have to make a snap decision about which school your child will attend, at least temporarily, simply because the school year is about to start and there is no time for more thorough consideration. Given an opportunity, Judges prefer helping parents reach agreement, or (if that is not possible) to give both parents a fair and full hearing before making such an important decision. Discussing the matter as early as possible with an experienced family law attorney will help ensure your best opportunity to make your case to the court.

A common misconception is that a Pennsylvania judge will choose to send your child to the “better” school district, or will favor private school over a public education. This is very much a myth; it is seldom that simple. Judges understand that you and your co-parent know your children far better than they ever can. They also know that while some children perform better in a large district with many resources, others might flourish best in a smaller school with fewer students and more individualized attention from teachers. Some private schools offer top-level academic programs which help some children, whereas others may have institutional issues such as falling enrollment or insufficient funding. Your children’s friends might attend one of the two schools. There are other considerations that relate to the parents rather than to the schools, such as their relative economic means, their own respective educational backgrounds, how involved each of them has been up to now in the children’s education, whether one parent is more accommodating or informative toward the other parent in educational matters, and what agreements they have made in the past about their children’s education. The logistics of each possible outcome also matters; perhaps one outcome will allow the current custody arrangement to remain in place, whereas the other outcome might require a disruptive change to your children’s schedule. The focus of the court is always upon the best interest of the child, viewed holistically.

This is why, when a judge makes a decision in a school choice dispute, the order is often framed as awarding “sole legal custody for the purpose of school choice” to the selected parent (or similar phrasing). Judges prefer to maintain parents in equal provisions of authority over their children, limiting one parent’s leverage over another to ‘either/or’ situations such as school choice. Even then, both parents remain equally-entitled (and expected) to participate fully in the children’s education at the school selected by the choosing parent, and each will retain full access to academic records.

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If you need the help of an experienced family law attorney for your shared legal custody case in Southside, Lawrenceville or Homestead, call our office to set up a personal consultation with an experienced Pittsburgh area child custody lawyer and to learn how to get the most out of your parental litigation dispute. Please do not comment anonymously, and do not post anything that you consider confidential. We try to be responsive to commentary and questions, but know that posting here will not create an attorney/client relationship and that we will not offer legal advice via the Internet.

Navigating extracurricular activities in your custody case

November 25, 2019 · by Pittsburgh Family Law Services, P.C.

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“We are apt to forget that children watch examples better than they listen to preaching.” – Roy L. Smith

Separated parents often find themselves fighting over their children’s extra-curricular activities. Disagreements can become heartaches: which activities and programs to choose, how many are too many, whether children may be signed up for activities during the other parent’s custodial time, and what happens when one parent declares an activity too dangerous, too time-consuming, or too expensive. Making decisions about extra-curricular activities is a legal custody issue, and usually that means the court expects parents to work together to figure these things out. When the “together” part turns out to be easier said than done, disagreements can be brought to court.

Often, children will be permitted to continue participating in activities they were already involved in before the court became involved. There are always exceptions, such as if a child no longer wants to participate, if the costs go up drastically, or if the activity itself has changed in a way that makes it objectionable to a parent. Most activity disputes that end up in court have to do with new activities, especially if one parent’s decision to enroll the child commits the other parent to supporting the child’s involvement in the activity during his or her own custody time.

When parental disputes like this do end up in court, judges tend to favor children being permitted to participate in extracurricular activities that appeal to them, and if that is the court’s decision both parents will be expected to ensure that the child is able to participate fully. However, judges know they are poor substitutes for parents when making these decisions, and they will still expect parents to coordinate together directly for the benefit of their children. Coordinating and consulting with your co-parent is not just about checking in and asking permission, but also is about making sure that if you are not inadvertently scheduling a commitment that occurs at the same time as something else your child is already scheduled to attend. Many parental disagreements happen because one parent chose not to check in with the other to confirm there were no timing issues with the activity.

Parents often can more effectively resolve issues arising from extra-curricular activities (and many others) by participating in a program of co-parenting counseling. Having a structured, refereed forum in which each parent is able to raise address his or her concerns is often far more effective – and far less expensive – than going to a judge and letting the court tell you both how you must raise your children. The vast majority of disagreements can be resolved by this type of dialogue in a way that litigation can never do.

Of course, it is not always possible to resolve parental disagreements without court intervention. This is often true when one parent views an activity as being particularly dangerous or morally objectionable, if one parent schedules activities to interfere with the other parent’s time without advance agreement, or if the activity will require substantial travel or a large commitment of money or time. In these situations, the court has the power to give one parent the overriding authority to make such decisions.

If you and your child’s other parent disagree about extra-curricular activities and you are considering taking the matter to court, it is important that you speak with an attorney before you take any action. An experienced attorney can help you to identify whether the disagreement is one that is better addressed in co-parenting counseling or by other means, or whether it is worth the effort to bring it in front of the judge.

If you need legal assistance with your physical custody case in Pittsburgh’s Southside, Upper St. Clair or Mt. Lebanon, call our office to set up a personal consultation with an experienced Allegheny County child custody attorney and to learn how to get the most out of your co-parent dispute. Please do not comment anonymously, and do not post anything that you consider confidential. We try to be responsive to commentary and questions, but know that posting here will not create an attorney/client relationship and that we will not offer legal advice via the Internet.

Pennsylvania child custody law is changing: can grandparents and non-parents still file?

May 11, 2018 · by Pittsburgh Family Law Services, P.C.

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“Remember that children, marriages, and flower gardens reflect the kind of care they get.” – H. Jackson Brown, Jr.

The most fortunate children grow up being loved by many adults besides their parents, but loving a child cannot by itself confer the right to claim custody of that child in Pennsylvania. Only people who have “standing” under the law may ask a Pennsylvania family court to grant them an award of custody.

On May 4, 2018 Pennsylvania Governor Tom Wolf signed into law Senate Bill 844, which makes some major changes to who can petition a PA family court for child custody. It affects grandparents’ rights to ask for custody of their grandchildren; and under certain circumstances, it grants standing for the very first time to third-parties such as aunts, uncles and other close relatives to sue for custody. The new law takes effect on July 3, 2018, sixty days after being adopted.

What is “standing” in a Pennsylvania child custody case?
Standing, for purposes of the law, has to do with who has the right to make a claim before the court, and to have that claim heard. Going to court in Pennsylvania was never meant to be a free-for-all; you must have a reasonable basis to ask for what you want the court to grant. If you are a parent, you always have standing to request a PA court to determine your custody rights toward your own children… but probably not to ask that same court to make decisions about my children.

Having standing to file for custody of kids does not mean that you will win, of course. It just means that you have the right to make the request. You still will have to back up your claim according to the standards set under PA child custody law, and to convince a judge that the custody arrangement you want to establish is the right outcome.

No matter how much you love a child nor how committed you may be to that child’s well-being, the courtroom door will be closed and barred against you if you lack standing to make the claim.

Who can sue for any form of physical and legal custody of a child in Pennsylvania?
Pennsylvania child custody law makes a distinction between physical custody (the right to obtain the physical presence of a child) and legal custody (the right to participate in the parental decision-making process over that child). Likewise, there is a difference between the kind of standing that will let the claimant ask for any form of physical or legal custody over a child, and the kind that sets a lower standard, and that is limited to claims for partial physical custody or supervised partial physical custody.

You can make any claim for physical and legal custody of a child if (and only if) you fit into one of these categories:

Parents. That’s no surprise. If you are a child’s parent whose parental rights have not been terminated by a court (for example, by adoption), you can make your claim and be heard.

A person who stands in loco parentis to the child. “In loco parentis” standing applies to an adult who is not a parent to a particular child either by blood or by adoption, but whose relationship with the child was begun by a blood (or adoptive) parent in anticipation that it would become indistinguishable from a parental relationship. In practice, this means that the child has resided with the adult who claims in loco parentis standing Step-parents often can claim this kind of relationship, as can grandparents who have, in effect, become parents to their grandchildren due to the absence, incapacity or disinterest of the actual parents.

Grandparents not in loco parentis, who meet a strict and narrow standard. To meet the standard, the claimant must be a natural grandparent to the child (step-grandparents don’t make the cut), and the relationship with the child must have begun with the consent of a parent (or by court order). The grandparent must have assumed, or be willing to assume, responsibility for the child. Additionally, one of three things must be true: (1) the child must have been found “dependent” by a juvenile court; (2) the child is substantially at risk due to parental abuse, neglect, drug or alcohol abuse, or incapacity; (3) less than six months before the grandparent files the custody claim, the child had been living with that grandparent for at least twelve consecutive months before the child was removed from the home by a parent.

The above three categories were already in place under the old law. The 2018 change to PA child custody law establishes a fourth category of child custody claimant:

Any person who is able to establish by clear and convincing evidence: (1) that he or she has assumed or is willing to assume responsibility for the child; (2) that he or she has a sustained, substantial and sincere interest in the child’s welfare ; and (3) neither parent has any form of care and control of the child. The person who meets this standard need not be a grandparent, or even a blood relative. Please note that this category does not apply where there is a current dependency proceeding involving the child, or where the child has been adjudicated dependent and the court has made an award of permanent legal custody.

Who can sue for partial physical custody of a child in Pennsylvania?
People seeking custody under this form of standing are subject to strict limitations in the kind of relationship they can ask the child custody court to support. These people may claim time to spend with a child, but without the authority to make parent-level decisions:

The parent of a deceased parent. Grandparents can claim access to a grandchild if their own child, a parent to their grandchild, has died.

A grandparent with whom the child has resided for at least a full twelve months, if the grandparent files the custody claim within six months after the child was removed from the grandparent’s home by a parent.

The 2018 change to the Pennsylvania custody code also grants standing to file for custody to:

A grandparent whose relationship with the child began either by a parent’s consent or by court order, when the parents have commenced a custody proceeding and when the parents cannot agree over whether the grandparent should have custody.

Who lost standing when the law changed?
Grandparents are no longer able to file for partial physical custody simply because the parents of their grandchild have been separated for six months or longer, or because the parents are parties to a divorce proceeding.

If you need legal assistance with your grandparents’ rights case or otherwise protecting children you are caring for, call our office to set up a personal consultation with a Pittsburgh child custody law attorney. Please do not comment anonymously, and do not post anything that you consider confidential. We try to be responsive to commentary and questions, but know that posting here will not create an attorney/client relationship and that we will not offer legal advice via the Internet.

Child custody in Pennsylvania

November 8, 2013 · by Pittsburgh Family Law Services, P.C.

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Generally
Before a couple separates, there is no established “custody” of the children, and neither parent has more rights toward the children than the other. It is important for parents to realize that even if their romantic relationship is ending, their relationship as parents will continue as long as they live; they are stuck with each other, for good or ill. It can be extremely difficult to avoid letting the problems between the adults spill over into the parenting, but insulating children from those disputes is ultimately the best and most constructive thing to do. There is simply no substitute for two parents working together in the best interest of their children, and letting the children see their parents continuing to cooperate after they separate can ease their transition into the new situation, however it works out. Remember that no lawyer or judge can love your children the way you do, and no one is more qualified to decide what is best for children than their parents. Finding themselves in the middle of disputes between their parents is traumatic for children, even if it is sometimes unavoidable. Never forget that for children, particularly young children, you and the other parent are their world.

No matter how willing you are to keep adult issues between the adults, however, sometimes a parent is forced into dispute by the actions of the other parent. In that instance, the court is available to address the dispute and attempt to bring stability to the situation. Bear in mind, however, that not only can custody litigation be very expensive and personally difficult if matters do not resolve through settlement, it places the decision-making power into the hands of a judge who is likely to presume until proven otherwise that both of you are competent, capable parents who simply cannot agree about the welfare of your children. It is also true that custody litigation can sometimes be a necessary “wake up call” to an over-controlling parent whose actions are interfering with the other parent’s relationship with the children.

Custody rights are viewed in Pennsylvania as belonging to your children, rather than either to you or to the other parent. Should a custody matter be brought before a family court, that court will have only one consideration: the best interest of your children. It is important to realize that no court will care how hurt you might be over the situation, or how outraged you might be, or how much you miss your children; a judge will be deaf to all arguments based on those concerns, and will focus only on your children’s welfare.

Because the welfare of your children is at stake, it is often a good idea to be proactive about custody issues; that does not always mean using a court as a first resort, but it does mean trying to stabilize the situation and reach agreements, if possible, while getting as much information as you can to help you decide what to do in the event that no agreement can be reached. Your divorce and family law attorney can advise you not only about your options in court, but also about possible approaches to the situation (and to your co-parent) that may allow you to resolve your situation without litigation.

Court-ordered programs
Courts recognize that a judge makes a poor substitute for a child’s parents. When a parent files a custody dispute in most counties in Pennsylvania, both parents (and sometimes the children) will have to attend court-mandated dispute resolution programs. In Allegheny County, for example, the parents will have to participate in the Generations Program, consisting of an educational seminar, age-appropriate programs for children between the ages of 6 and 15, and a two-hour mediation session. Parents will sometimes also be ordered to participate in a “co-parenting counseling” program, in an effort to improve communication between them and to give them an opportunity to air and discuss grievances in a protected environment. These programs often do lead to settlements, so it is a good idea to go into them with an open mind, even if you are skeptical about how useful they are likely to be.

Physical custody and legal custody
There is a distinction in Pennsylvania between “physical” and “legal” custody of your children. Physical custody identifies which parent has the right to take the children from the other parent at a particular time. Legal custody identifies who has the right to be notified about matters affecting the children, who has access to information and records about them, who has the right to be consulted before decisions are made about them, etc. “Visitation,” as opposed to physical custody, is a much weaker relationship. There are rare occasions (usually involving violent behavior) in which a parent is limited to supervised visitation.

Many custody relationships between separated parents are based on one parent having primary physical custody, with the other parent having partial physical custody (such as every other weekend with time during weekday evenings, with arrangements for holidays and vacations), although the trend in Pennsylvania appears to be to maximize each parent’s involvement with the children in a shared physical custody arrangement, to the extent possible. Whatever the physical custody arrangement, both parents usually share joint legal custody in recognition that neither of them should be forced to become a part-time parent. Only in rare circumstances does a parent get an award of sole custody of a child.

There is no ‘magic age’ at which children get to decide for themselves between their parents. Judges often will talk to the children in a disputed custody situation, but will not automatically allow a child to select his or her own custody arrangement; instead, judges will take the entire situation into account, and will decide accordingly.

If you need legal assistance with your divorce or family law matter in Southwestern Pennsylvania, call me to set up a personal consultation. Please do not comment anonymously, and do not post anything that you consider confidential. We try to be responsive to commentary and questions, but know that posting here will not create an attorney/client relationship and that we will not offer legal advice via the Internet.

Paying child support in Pennsylvania: a survival guide

November 4, 2013 · by Pittsburgh Family Law Services, P.C.

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You have been ordered to pay support for your spouse and/or for your children. Despite your willingness to make the best of a difficult situation, the “one size fits all” Domestic Relations system can still trip you up. The devil is always in the details where support orders are concerned, and losing track can cause you grief down the line. The suggestions below should help you stay out of trouble and protect your rights.

READ YOUR ORDER. You are bound to its terms, even the “boilerplate.” Know your obligations as well as your rights. Violating your order can get you into serious – and expensive – trouble. Remember that the best way to get out of trouble is not to get into it in the first place, and forewarned is definitely forearmed.

WHEN YOUR INCOME CHANGES SUBSTANTIALLY, your Order requires you to report the change to the court and to the person receiving the support money, in writing. This includes substantial increases and decreases of income and change (or loss) of employment. Even though reporting a raise might end up with you being dragged back to Court for a possible increase in support, your silence assumes the risk that it could come back to haunt you later. When you change jobs, be sure to provide the court with your new employer’s name and address as soon as possible, and remember that the ultimate obligation to pay support is yours, and not your employer’s. All communications to the court should include your ten-digit Member Number (which the court will assign), your docket number and nine-digit PACSES number. Keep track of all communications with the court (including the date of your communication), and keep copies of anything you send. When you send something to the Court, you should also send it to the person receiving the support or his/her attorney.

CONTACT YOUR ATTORNEY PROMPTLY if you lose your job, take a substantial pay cut, if anything else happens that might interfere with your ability to pay, or if you are notified that a hearing has been scheduled in your case. If you are considering leaving your job for one with lower pay, discuss this with your attorney before resigning. Letting time pass without taking action can get you into trouble if you fail to pay as ordered, and will postpone any favorable changes to which you might be entitled. Usually, changes to support orders only date back to when you filed your request for modification. Talk to your family law attorney before requesting modification, because those requests can sometimes backfire on you. Remember that reporting a reduced income to the court is not the same thing as asking for a modification to your support order!

DON’T WAIT FOR THE WAGE ATTACHMENT before you start paying. Your payroll department can take up to a month or more to process the wage attachment order, and meanwhile you are on the hook. After all, you are the one who will be in trouble if you become delinquent in your obligation. There will be a new line-item deduction on your paycheck when the wage attachment takes effect; meanwhile, for each paycheck that does not deduct your support payment, you should send a check for a pro-rated amount to the court (your family law attorney can provide you with a payment coupon if the court did not). If you are paid every two weeks, multiply your monthly support obligation by 12 and divide by 26 to learn how much to send from each pay. If possible, avoid paying by money order; all your receipt can prove is that a money order existed, and not who cashed it.

OBEY THE ORDER. The court will enforce its own orders. Even if you are appealing the order or waiting for a hearing for the court to consider modifying your order downward, you remain obligated to obey each order unless and until it is changed. If you fall too far behind in your support obligation, automatic enforcement procedures start to kick in that can include contempt proceedings, suspension of driver’s license and professional license, increased payment against arrears, negative credit agency reports, and tax refund interception.

WHEN YOUR CHILD EMANCIPATES, your obligation to support that child ends. A child usually emancipates when he or she turns eighteen years of age, and no longer attends High School. Exceptions can be made for adult children who have never been emancipated, and are incapable of self-support due to extreme physical or psychiatric handicaps. The burden is on you to request support termination in a timely fashion, since the termination usually cannot be effective before you file your claim.

NEVER MISS A HEARING. Failure to attend a scheduled hearing can result in the court proceeding without you (and you will be stuck with the result!), and it can even issue a “body attachment” warrant for your arrest. You will usually be notified of hearings only by a single letter sent by first class mail; if that mail is not returned by the Post Office as undeliverable, the court will assume that you received it and have been notified, whether you actually know about the hearing, or not. If the court sends you mail, always open and read it right away! You can ask the court for postponement of a hearing if you are unavailable, but always through Motions Court, and always in advance; the responsibility is on you to take care of this properly, and in a timely fashion. Assume that no excuse is good enough to get you out from under the penalties from a missed hearing, except the most extreme emergency… and even then, it will be your responsibility to be proactive.

IMMEDIATELY REPORT CHANGES OF ADDRESS TO THE COURT and the other side. This is your responsibility and no one else’s, and it is in your interest to ensure that the court knows where to send notices to you. Make sure that your family law attorney also knows your change of address, even if he no longer represents you, unless he officially withdrew. Sometimes, attorneys are served with court notices instead of you, and your attorney needs to know where to forward the notice.

NEVER COMPLETELY TRUST THE WORD OF COURT PERSONNEL OR YOUR “EX” without something in writing to back it up. When dealing with the court, different people will sometimes tell you different things, especially if you are on the telephone; you will probably never know exactly who you are dealing with, how much he or she actually knows, how much authority the person actually has, or whether the person will follow through. Support payees have been known to “forget” about direct payments or promises, especially when there is no paper trail for proof. “The clerk told me it was okay if…” will never get you out of trouble, nor will “My ex told me it was okay if I got behind in my support for a while, as long as I catch up later.” Play it safe, and consult your family law attorney.

DO NOT PAY YOUR “EX” DIRECTLY, once the Order is issued. Without a “Notice to Credit Direct Payment” form filed promptly with your local collection office, you only get credit for payments made through the Pennsylvania State Collection and Disbursement Unit (PA SCDU) in Harrisburg. Play it safe and pay only through SCDU, or you risk having to pay the same debt twice.

IF YOUR EMPLOYMENT IS SEASONAL OR YOUR OVERTIME FLUCTUATES, this should have been taken into account when your support order was issued. The fact that your income drops during portions of the year does not usually reduce your support obligation during those times. Be sure to set aside some money during the good months to pay directly to the Court during your off season, to ensure that you do not fall behind in your support obligation. Your duty to pay continues whether or not you are bringing in enough money during a given month; preparing in advance can turn what could have been a personal disaster into a mere inconvenience. If you are not sure how much to send, talk to your family law attorney.

KEEP GOOD FINANCIAL RECORDS. This includes tax records and pay stubs, as well as any and all other sources of income (unemployment compensation, “side jobs,” etc.). The more organized you are, the more effectively your family law attorney can advise you and represent your interests.

THERE IS NO ACCOUNTABILITY FOR HOW THE SUPPORT MONEY IS SPENT by the recipient. You have no right to demand receipts, or to insist that it be spent in particular ways. It just goes into the recipient’s household income.

YOU MUST MAKE YOUR SUPPORT PAYMENTS EVEN IF YOU DO NOT OR CANNOT SEE YOUR CHILDREN. Custody rights and support rights are usually not connected. If you try to withhold support because you are being prevented from seeing your children, the court will see it as if you were punishing the children for the other parent’s actions. For that reason, refusal to pay child support can harm your custody case. If you are being denied access to your children, discuss the matter with your family law attorney promptly, because delay is another thing that can harm your custody case.

WHEN IN DOUBT, FIND OUT! Was your most recent payment received? Are you behind in your support? How much do you still owe on your arrears? These and other questions can be answered by contacting the Pennsylvania Statewide Collection and Disbursement Unit (PA SCDU) at 1-877-727-7238, or on the web at www.childsupport.state.pa.us.

SOME OF THE SUPPORT YOU PAY MAY BE TAX-DEDUCTIBLE. Child support is not deductible from your Federal taxable income, but spousal support (and alimony) usually is. Many support awards for spouse and children are unallocated, meaning that they do not separately identify one part for your spouse, and another for your children; payments on unallocated awards are usually completely deductible from your Federal taxable income; consult your family law attorney and/or a tax professional to be sure. Be sure to keep your own records for tax purposes, since (unlike your employer) the court will not supply you with a year-end summary statement. You can get a printout of how much support you have paid during a particular year either from your local court, or from the web at www.childsupport.state.pa.us.

IF YOUR CHILD IS NOT LIVING WITH THE OTHER PARENT to whom you are paying support, you should promptly ask the court to terminate the support award, since any delay will delay termination of the award. Worse, if your child is or was in County placement and you do not terminate the support award to the other parent, you could find yourself paying support twice for the same time period! The County will sue you for support to recover a portion of its costs during the period of County placement, even if your child is no longer in custody at the time you are notified of the suit (which can happen even years afterward). It is sometimes possible to win against the County’s support claim based on their delay in proceeding, and/or an inability to pay.

If you need legal assistance with your divorce or family law matter in Southwestern Pennsylvania, call my office to set up a personal consultation with an experienced Pittsburgh child support lawyer, and to learn more about Pennsylvania child custody laws and how they affect you. Please do not comment anonymously, and do not post anything that you consider confidential. We try to be responsive to commentary and questions, but know that posting here will not create an attorney/client relationship and that we will not offer legal advice via the Internet.

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